Guest Blogger Christen Olivarez: When a Girl Says “I Do”

Please join me in welcoming to our blog, Director of Publishing and savvy creative, Christen Olivarez. Today she offers a glimpse inside an exciting new season of her life filled with wedding planning blisses (and some misses.) From venue choices to guest lists galore, after making a few wrong turns, Christen finds herself at what seems to be a dead end. But with time and a wise word from a friend, she finally finds what she had been searching for all along: the recipe to achieve a simple, authentic gathering amongst loyal friends and loved family.

Photo Credit: Johanna Love

When A Girl Says I Do

A funny thing happens when you get engaged. People come out of the woodwork to share their opinions on what you should do for your wedding. Venues are recommended, caterers are referred — everyone has something to say, and it’s all a bit overwhelming.

Last year, my then-boyfriend and I attended a lot of weddings. By a lot, I mean that virtually everyone within our circle of friends got married. Each wedding was very different, and we found ourselves commenting on what we would like or wouldn’t like, should the big day ever come for us. We were very much in agreement on what we wanted: a small, intimate, backyard celebration.

Flash-forward to this past June, when on a trip to Portland to celebrate our eight-year anniversary, I was proposed to while taking a stroll through the park to escape the sudden downpour of rain. Suddenly I found myself looking up venues, planning a monstrous guest list, and crunching an ever-growing budget. All previous plans of small and intimate were out the window, and my patient fiancé seemed to be on board.

It wasn’t until a month after we booked a venue that I started to have second thoughts. I found myself adding people to our guest lists just to fill the space. More guests meant more food, which meant an even bigger budget. Something didn’t feel right, and I was on the verge of a panic attack.
It was my future mother-in-law who saw the anxiety I was experiencing who simply asked, “Why don’t you just do it at home, the way you always wanted to?” I looked at my fiancé and asked him if he thought we could really do it. He took this opportunity to tell me that he was much happier with the original plan and would prefer to go that route. As I did some quick planning in my head, I instantly felt the panic leave my body. We could do it. Our backyard was big enough. And heck, if I had it at my home, I had complete creative control over everything. I was in.

So I am now in the middle of planning a very small backyard wedding that will take place on Memorial Day Weekend. Our yard isn’t anything special, but it will be. Yes, I’m sure people will still wish we opted for a bigger, more conventional wedding, but what I’ve learned is this: You have to do what is right for you. Sometimes you just have to shut out everyone else and do what sits right with your soul.

 

About the Artist: Christen Olivarez is the Director of Publishing for Stampington & Company and editor-in-chief of Somerset Studio, Somerset Life, Mingle, HandCrafted, and Artists’ Café.Interests: art, slow food, writing, books, yarn, authentic living Follow Christen on Her Blog: thedeliberatelife.typepad.com